by Shawn Weber, JD, CLS-F | Aug 15, 2018 | Uncategorized
The KOGO AM 600 Morning News with anchors Ted Garcia and LaDona Harvey featured a live interview with family law attorney Shawn Weber of Weber Dispute Resolution on Wednesday, August 16.
Weber discussed tips from his latest blog post, "Back to School Doesn't Have to Mean Back to Court," which offers advice for divorced parents on solving disagreements over their children and their return to school. Conflicts regarding spending over clothing and supplies, communication from school officials, and participation in various extracurricular school activities are common sources of friction between divorced parents. The failure to solve these problems can send parents back to their attorneys, and even back to court.
If you missed the interview, you can listen to it here.
Avoid an expensive trip back to court – contact Weber Dispute Resolution
Back to school sometimes sends divorced parents back to court. Are you fighting over:
- Responsibility for buying school supplies?
- Who’s driving the kids to school?
- After-school activities?
- Who talks to your kids’ teachers?
- Emergency contact?
- Who gets to sit where at the school play?
Call on Weber Dispute Resolution to help you and your clients get an A-plus on school plans that work for the entire family. Weber Dispute Resolution can help you avoid an expensive, lengthy, and emotionally damaging court fight. Call 858-410-0144 to set up a private settlement conference.
by Shawn Weber, JD, CLS-F | Jul 11, 2018 | Uncategorized
For most couples getting divorced, their children are their single highest priority. Child support and child custody are their immediate concerns. When you go through the court system in California and in other states, the judge applies a formula to determine the amount of child support. Courts consider income as well as the tax effects of the parties’ various income. They then apply the state mandatory child support guidelines. If this decision goes in front of a judge, he or she has to follow the guidelines to the letter. If you do it on your own, there is flexibility to reach a more creative and equitable solution for your unique situation.
What couples don’t often consider are expenses which seem to be a long way off such as the costs of a college education. This can be one of the single most expensive mistakes couples make if it gets overlooked.
College expenses can be something the parties agree on, but the California Family Code does not require this. The Family Code is only concerned about what happens to your minor children until they reach age 18, or are no longer high school students. This is when child support ends.
Courts will not order parents to pay for college unless the parties agree. Most of my clients don’t choose to include orders in their marital settlement agreements relating to payments for college. You can imagine the problems if something goes wrong. What if the time comes, and you can’t afford to pay for college due to unemployment or disability – but you have a court order that says you must pay? If this occurs, your own child might have a legal cause against you. That’s not exactly healthy for family relationships.
Most of my clients opt out of having a college expenses provision included in their divorce decree. Sometimes, the parties agree to contribute to a 529 college savings fund, which has certain tax advantages.
Have a conversation about college funding as part of your divorce
Whatever you decide, it’s important to have a conversation about college funding. Sometimes, this might mean you agree to meet at a future time, closer to your child’s decision about college. The choice of college can be crucial. What if one parent is paying for college, and the other is encouraging the child to go to a private, out-of-state college that’s not necessarily affordable? If you’re lucky your child might be able to get a scholarship, which they found through something like Common Scholarship App (https://www.commonscholarshipapp.org/international-student-scholarship-guide/), to help with the funding however sometimes they are not so fortunate.
Simply because the family court isn’t going to order a couple to do something in the future doesn’t mean the expense isn’t going to come up. Discussing everyone’s individual expectations is crucial. Parents and their children may have different values about the college choice and the college expenses.
We recently worked with divorcing parents who had completely opposite opinions about college financing. One parent said, “I had to work and scrimp and save and take out loans, and I appreciated my college education more for it.” The other parent said, “No, this is our responsibility as parents to take care of our child’s college education.” This is an important conversation they needed to work through.
It’s often helpful to bring in a mental health professional to work with the parents when they have different values about what’s going to happen with college expenses. That’s exactly what we did, and in the end, the parents were able to reach an agreement.
Get expert advice on college expenses from a financial professional
For practical reasons, couples may also want to confer with a financial professional about their financing options. Does it make sense to set up a 529 account? Are loans or grants practical? What can they truly afford? What is the best vehicle to save for college?
Alternative dispute resolution options such as mediation or Collaborative Practice are ideal when divorcing parents need to work through complex financial decisions which may affect their family in the future, even years into the future. As any parent of a college student will tell you, those years pass by much more quickly than you realize. It’s best to talk now and come up with a plan.
Call on Weber Dispute Resolution for help in starting your family’s conversation about making college possible and practical for your children even after divorce.
by Shawn Weber, JD, CLS-F | Jul 11, 2018 | Uncategorized
For most couples getting divorced, their children are their single highest priority. Child support and child custody are their immediate concerns. When you go through the court system in California and in other states, the judge applies a formula to determine the amount of child support. Courts consider income as well as the tax effects of the parties’ various income. They then apply the state mandatory child support guidelines. If this decision goes in front of a judge, he or she has to follow the guidelines to the letter. If you do it on your own, there is flexibility to reach a more creative and equitable solution for your unique situation.
What couples don’t often consider are expenses which seem to be a long way off such as the costs of a college education. This can be one of the single most expensive mistakes couples make if it gets overlooked.
College expenses can be something the parties agree on, but the California Family Code does not require this. The Family Code is only concerned about what happens to your minor children until they reach age 18, or are no longer high school students. This is when child support ends.
Courts will not order parents to pay for college unless the parties agree. Most of my clients don’t choose to include orders in their marital settlement agreements relating to payments for college. You can imagine the problems if something goes wrong. What if the time comes, and you can’t afford to pay for college due to unemployment or disability – but you have a court order that says you must pay? If this occurs, your own child might have a legal cause against you. That’s not exactly healthy for family relationships.
Most of my clients opt out of having a college expenses provision included in their divorce decree. Sometimes, the parties agree to contribute to a 529 college savings fund, which has certain tax advantages.
Have a conversation about college funding as part of your divorce
Whatever you decide, it’s important to have a conversation about college funding. Sometimes, this might mean you agree to meet at a future time, closer to your child’s decision about college. The choice of college can be crucial. What if one parent is paying for college, and the other is encouraging the child to go to a private, out-of-state college that’s not necessarily affordable? If you’re lucky your child might be able to get a scholarship, which they found through something like Common Scholarship App (https://www.commonscholarshipapp.org/international-student-scholarship-guide/), to help with the funding however sometimes they are not so fortunate.
Simply because the family court isn’t going to order a couple to do something in the future doesn’t mean the expense isn’t going to come up. Discussing everyone’s individual expectations is crucial. Parents and their children may have different values about the college choice and the college expenses.
We recently worked with divorcing parents who had completely opposite opinions about college financing. One parent said, “I had to work and scrimp and save and take out loans, and I appreciated my college education more for it.” The other parent said, “No, this is our responsibility as parents to take care of our child’s college education.” This is an important conversation they needed to work through.
It’s often helpful to bring in a mental health professional to work with the parents when they have different values about what’s going to happen with college expenses. That’s exactly what we did, and in the end, the parents were able to reach an agreement.
Get expert advice on college expenses from a financial professional
For practical reasons, couples may also want to confer with a financial professional about their financing options. Does it make sense to set up a 529 account? Are loans or grants practical? What can they truly afford? What is the best vehicle to save for college?
Alternative dispute resolution options such as mediation or Collaborative Practice are ideal when divorcing parents need to work through complex financial decisions which may affect their family in the future, even years into the future. As any parent of a college student will tell you, those years pass by much more quickly than you realize. It’s best to talk now and come up with a plan.
Call on Weber Dispute Resolution for help in starting your family’s conversation about making college possible and practical for your children even after divorce.
by Shawn Weber, JD, CLS-F | Jun 4, 2018 | Uncategorized
I regularly serve as a pro tem settlement judge on the Mandatory Settlement Conference (MSC) Panel with the San Diego County Superior Court. While I enjoy helping folks through their MSCs, the help is simply too little too late for many people.
Often, the preparation for the MSC is nearly as stressful and costly as preparing for the trial itself for everyone involved including the attorneys, clients, and other professionals who may be involved.
Lawyers need to certify that discovery is complete and prepare elaborate briefs. Waiting until the very end of a case to attempt mediation does the parties and the professionals a great disservice. The pained and stressed-out expressions on the faces of the parties and counsel at the MSCs I facilitate say it all.
Better Options for Settling Cases: Early Mediation
If your family law case is at a crossroads, consider mediation to take it from conflict to quick conclusion. Photo: Geralt/Pixabay
There are many options near the beginning of the case to settle issues, manage discovery concerns, and resolve unnecessary conflict. Even (and especially) high conflict cases can benefit from earlier intervention with a mediator to short circuit the conflict. Attorneys benefit from early mediation because it helps them settle the cases with a realistic chance of settling successfully. It frees them up to focus on trials for cases that won’t settle.
Here are some ideas for how you can engage the ADR services of a mediator early in your family law case.
Meet and Confer – On Steroids
Every family law attorney is aware of the requirement for the “meet and confer” conference. Too often it’s simply given lip service by a short phone call to opposing counsel without discussing the issues. Because lawyers sometimes give less attention to what needs to happen to settle, the case stalls.
Why not have a facilitated meet and confer settlement conference to identify the issues and formulate a plan for a swift conclusion?
Discovery Management At Lower Cost
Often the most expensive part of a case is the discovery, which involves elaborate and arcane procedures to gather as much evidence as possible. Sometimes this takes place whether the case needs the information or not. The adversarial process spurs less and not more cooperation in discovery. As a result, parties can face months or even years of time-consuming, expensive discovery wars.
Why not use a mediator to help “referee” the discovery? Most discovery can be provided informally at much less cost. A mediator can help facilitate the discovery process to specifically target discovery needs. The mediator can help everyone conclude the case with fewer headaches and less stress for the lawyers. This results in a lower cost for the parties.
Successfully Managing the High Conflict Case
You don’t have to endure the nuclear option in a high conflict case. Mediation can be highly successful. Photo: Alex Andropov86/Pixabay
There is a common misconception that people cannot mediate high conflict cases. It’s simply not true.
Most high conflict behavior in divorce cases is based on fear and hurt. That’s because Court proceedings tend to exacerbate and actually encourage high conflict responses. So, engaging a good mediator early in the process reduces conflict by managing the fight-or-flight response.
Rather than encouraging conflict including ugly public fights in court, consider short-circuiting conflict with a mediator experienced in high conflict. If the parties learn early how to interact productively, it then makes the rest of the case go more smoothly, and often more quickly.
Use Early Intervention Through Mediation to Resolve Interim Issues
The terribly backlogged family courts sometimes take months to hear even the most routine (and sometimes pressing) interim motions. Working with you and your clients in mediation, I can help you resolve interim questions like support and custody in a fraction of the time and cost compared to filing a Request for Order. Because a mediated settlement conference efficiently resolves interim issues, the parties can relax a little more. Instead of reacting to ongoing problems, people can focus on concluding the case.
Consider a Court-Ordered Family Centered Case Resolution Plan Per Family Code Section 2451
Court ordered family centered case resolution plan under the California Family Code Section 2451 is a valuable tool in your toolkit.
One little-known Family Code provisions involves the use of Alternate Dispute Resolution (ADR) as part of a court-ordered family centered case resolution plan. It is described in Family Code Section 2451. Additionally, California Rule of Court 5.83 describes how to implement the plan. Parties can appoint a case manager as part of the plan. They can also apply Code of Civil Procedure Section 639 to appoint the case manager as a discovery referee. Further, Family Code Section 2451 (a)(3) gives protection to attorneys who follow any discovery plans adopted as part of a court-ordered family resolution plan as follows:
“Limitations on discovery, including temporary suspension pending exploration of settlement. There is a rebuttable presumption that an attorney who carries out discovery as provided in a family centered case resolution plan has fulfilled his or her duty of care to the client as to the existence of community property.”
This Family Code section 2451 procedure has been effective in my experience. It can do a lot to reduce costs, and keep the case moving quickly towards settlement.
Because there are many ADR options beyond an end-of-case settlement conference where a mediator can make a huge difference, the key is to start early. Call on Weber Dispute Resolution to help. We have the training, skills, and experience to get your family law case past stuck. Our approach serves to support existing relationships with legal counsel, and will preserve the family’s wealth by reducing family conflict. Peace of mind is priceless.
by Shawn Weber, JD, CLS-F | Jun 4, 2018 | Uncategorized
I regularly serve as a pro tem settlement judge on the Mandatory Settlement Conference (MSC) Panel with the San Diego County Superior Court. While I enjoy helping folks through their MSCs, the help is simply too little too late for many people.
Often, the preparation for the MSC is nearly as stressful and costly as preparing for the trial itself for everyone involved including the attorneys, clients, and other professionals who may be involved.
Lawyers need to certify that discovery is complete and prepare elaborate briefs. Waiting until the very end of a case to attempt mediation does the parties and the professionals a great disservice. The pained and stressed-out expressions on the faces of the parties and counsel at the MSCs I facilitate say it all.
Better Options for Settling Cases: Early Mediation
If your family law case is at a crossroads, consider mediation to take it from conflict to quick conclusion. Photo: Geralt/Pixabay
There are many options near the beginning of the case to settle issues, manage discovery concerns, and resolve unnecessary conflict. Even (and especially) high conflict cases can benefit from earlier intervention with a mediator to short circuit the conflict. Attorneys benefit from early mediation because it helps them settle the cases with a realistic chance of settling successfully. It frees them up to focus on trials for cases that won’t settle.
Here are some ideas for how you can engage the ADR services of a mediator early in your family law case.
Meet and Confer – On Steroids
Every family law attorney is aware of the requirement for the “meet and confer” conference. Too often it’s simply given lip service by a short phone call to opposing counsel without discussing the issues. Because lawyers sometimes give less attention to what needs to happen to settle, the case stalls.
Why not have a facilitated meet and confer settlement conference to identify the issues and formulate a plan for a swift conclusion?
Discovery Management At Lower Cost
Often the most expensive part of a case is the discovery, which involves elaborate and arcane procedures to gather as much evidence as possible. Sometimes this takes place whether the case needs the information or not. The adversarial process spurs less and not more cooperation in discovery. As a result, parties can face months or even years of time-consuming, expensive discovery wars.
Why not use a mediator to help “referee” the discovery? Most discovery can be provided informally at much less cost. A mediator can help facilitate the discovery process to specifically target discovery needs. The mediator can help everyone conclude the case with fewer headaches and less stress for the lawyers. This results in a lower cost for the parties.
Successfully Managing the High Conflict Case
You don’t have to endure the nuclear option in a high conflict case. Mediation can be highly successful. Photo: Alex Andropov86/Pixabay
There is a common misconception that people cannot mediate high conflict cases. It’s simply not true.
Most high conflict behavior in divorce cases is based on fear and hurt. That’s because Court proceedings tend to exacerbate and actually encourage high conflict responses. So, engaging a good mediator early in the process reduces conflict by managing the fight-or-flight response.
Rather than encouraging conflict including ugly public fights in court, consider short-circuiting conflict with a mediator experienced in high conflict. If the parties learn early how to interact productively, it then makes the rest of the case go more smoothly, and often more quickly.
Use Early Intervention Through Mediation to Resolve Interim Issues
The terribly backlogged family courts sometimes take months to hear even the most routine (and sometimes pressing) interim motions. Working with you and your clients in mediation, I can help you resolve interim questions like support and custody in a fraction of the time and cost compared to filing a Request for Order. Because a mediated settlement conference efficiently resolves interim issues, the parties can relax a little more. Instead of reacting to ongoing problems, people can focus on concluding the case.
Consider a Court-Ordered Family Centered Case Resolution Plan Per Family Code Section 2451
Court ordered family centered case resolution plan under the California Family Code Section 2451 is a valuable tool in your toolkit.
One little-known Family Code provisions involves the use of Alternate Dispute Resolution (ADR) as part of a court-ordered family centered case resolution plan. It is described in Family Code Section 2451. Additionally, California Rule of Court 5.83 describes how to implement the plan. Parties can appoint a case manager as part of the plan. They can also apply Code of Civil Procedure Section 639 to appoint the case manager as a discovery referee. Further, Family Code Section 2451 (a)(3) gives protection to attorneys who follow any discovery plans adopted as part of a court-ordered family resolution plan as follows:
“Limitations on discovery, including temporary suspension pending exploration of settlement. There is a rebuttable presumption that an attorney who carries out discovery as provided in a family centered case resolution plan has fulfilled his or her duty of care to the client as to the existence of community property.”
This Family Code section 2451 procedure has been effective in my experience. It can do a lot to reduce costs, and keep the case moving quickly towards settlement.
Because there are many ADR options beyond an end-of-case settlement conference where a mediator can make a huge difference, the key is to start early. Call on Weber Dispute Resolution to help. We have the training, skills, and experience to get your family law case past stuck. Our approach serves to support existing relationships with legal counsel, and will preserve the family’s wealth by reducing family conflict. Peace of mind is priceless.
