Mediation can help you sort out even the most complex financial questions.
Complicated financial issues can make a divorce seem difficult, but mediation can help.
One common myth about divorce mediation deserves a debunking: You can’t mediate when there are complicated financial issues. This advice is completely wrong. The opposite is true. The more complex your divorce finances, mediation offers the best way to sort them out without resorting to expensive litigation.
Comparing costly, stressful divorce litigation in court, and the same divorce process using mediation, these are the reasons why mediation can be a better choice for complicated financial situations.
Financial declarations in divorce cases are the same no matter whether you go to court, or pursue alternative dispute resolution.
Courts require the identical forms used in mediation. Parties complete an Income and Expense Declaration (FL-150) and a Schedule of Assets and Debts (FL-142). The law requires disclosure of all material facts and circumstances related to money – whether asked for or not.
Additionally, parties can have financial disclosures reviewed by counsel before agreeing to anything. Whether your divorce is simple or you have profoundly complicated financial issues, your divorce process will require full disclosure. There is no difference between mediation and litigation in the level of detail.
Use a neutral financial specialist in mediation
The financial specialist can help gather information when there are complicated financial issues. Sometimes the parties may not know which questions to ask relating to the divorce finances. The financial specialist can help know what questions need to be asked and can also alert parties to red flags.
This is especially helpful when the parties are at different levels of knowledge relating to the finances. The financial specialist helps bring people to a level playing field. Reports that the financial specialists produce can be very helpful in uncovering options and finding pathways to settlement.
Because mediation relies on informal processes rather than formal and expensive discovery through litigation, people actually tend to get more information in mediation than in litigation.
The primary strategy for most litigation attorneys is to provide as little information as legally possible. With complex financial issues, it’s even more challenging.
But in mediation, information tends to be more forthcoming because people are not forced into tedious formal discovery processes. This may seem counterintuitive, but, actually it’s human nature. When people are forced to do things they tend not to cooperate. When things are voluntary, people are less threatened and more likely to do what they are supposed to do.
Mediation lets you be creative with solutions for your divorce finances
Judges must follow the law. The law isn’t flexible. Judges have limited options to offer you. But when people mediate, they are free to create a settlement best for the family.
I have seen many “outside-the-box” settlements in mediation. Most are far better for the family than what a court could ever provide.
Get independent legal and financial advice
There is no risk in mediation. Parties are not required or pressured to enter into any agreements without the option to talk with a lawyer before signing. You can have an agreement reviewed by your own financial professional at any point. This ensures parties are not left to their own devices when considering challenging money questions.
Avoid shark attorneys who discourage mediation
Shark type attorneys will discourage you from mediating. They might tell you court is your only option. Be skeptical. If you have significant assets, they want your case. This serves their interests, not yours. They know they can make a ton more money if they can fight over your financial issues.
Don’t get sucked into a litigated case when you don’t need to. You might believe your case is so difficult, only a judge can sort things out. In today’s family courts, judges do not have the time to spend on complicated details. Those details important to you can be lost. A skilled mediator can handle any issue you present. Mediators take all the time you need to be sure you address and resolve each detail to your satisfaction.
Make sure your mediator possesses the training and experience necessary. When things get complicated, he or she should be willing to bring in additional experts. Ask whether he or she has worked with couples in circumstances similar to yours. Your mediator should be able to offer examples. Don’t work with someone getting on the job training during your case.
In fact, financial issues are more likely to be resolved in a satisfactory manner using an alternative dispute resolution process with the option for creative solutions. Using a CDFA is very useful for this purpose.
I completely agree. As a mediator, all my cases are HNW, with estates between $2-30M. These clients are sophisticated and often emotionally complex. Using a CDFA to handle the financial issues keeps it nice and clean. Sometimes a spouse who doesn’t understand financial issues will have their own CDFA just to ‘verify’ what’s going on and help them gain financial literacy to maintain a wealthy post-divorce lifestyle. Each spouse has their own consulting attorney to help them understand the mediator’s job. Shawn, excellent advice about staying away from lawyers that don’t embrace mediation. I would also say to stay away from lawyers that don’t embrace the important role that the CDFA plays.